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Anyway, I told you that story to tell you this story. When I was 17, was arrested for being drunk... in... pub-lic. (Jeff Foxworthy says "There seems to be a pattern here, Ron.") (continuing) If you knew Morse Code, you'd already know that. And one DWI, which was a bogus charge because they were stopping everybody that was drivin' down that particular sidewalk... and that's profilin... and profilin' is wrong. On the drunk in public charge, the arresting officer, who I had literally known all my life, you know what I mean? This guy lived four doors down from me in a town of less than 400 people. We've met. Anyway, at the station, he asks me if I have any aliases. And I was just being a smartass and said, "Yeah, they call me... Tater Salad." Seventeen years later, I'm handcuffed to a bench with blood comin' out my nose, this cop comes up to me and says, "Are you Ron... 'Tater Salad' White?" You caught me! You caught the Tater! You can take down those roadblocks now. I call my son Tater Tot...and poot. (en) |
